Day 134

Put a lot of time into self-care today: saw H, dispenser of crazy pills, who upped my Wellbutrin and recommended folic acid, more exercise, and ample protein; and Dr. P, my new primary-care doc, who recommended fiber, more exercise, and ample fruits and veggies. She also found a growth (!) in my left ear canal (!) that shouldn't be there. Further analysis to come.

My take on this event, particularly viewed in tandem with an unexpected gynecological debacle that occurred last week, is that my life seems to be asking me to roll with an interesting variety of punches. I've had numerous problems with medical-related anxiety since the diabetes showed up five years ago. Always waiting for the next life-changing diagnosis, etc. I need a new approach to this stuff, some kind of grounding in a more stable perspective.

In other news, my mom seems to be careening into recovery in spite of herself. She's on new medication and apparently starting therapy in a couple of weeks. I'm very glad for her (and for myself), but mostly I just feel weary and wary. I'll believe she's getting real help when I see it, I guess. But this is farther than she's ever gone in that direction, so it's a start for sure.

It's good, to put it mildly, to not have to drink over any of this.